Now About That Stupid Bird

This morning was beautiful. The sun was just beginning to lighten and brighten the manicured lawn. My dogs were lying peacefully at my feet while I sat in silence drinking my first cup of coffee. My mind was filled with thoughts of gratitude and feelings of serenity.

But, there was this one bird. At first I included this little vocal creature on my gratitude list. It chirped and chirped and chirped to the point where I began to wonder if birds take breaths. The unrestrained whistles that filled the morning air soon became nothing more than a bird screaming in a nearby tree.

I became irritated at the feathered virtuoso. Soon my peaceful morning was turning into a battle between this 4 ounce resident of one tree on 54 Oak Haven and me. I shewed and shewed, tossed rocks out of the flower garden and generally worked up a good sweat trying to silence this wren that I had come to refer to as "stupid".

And, then it was over. The little thing flew away. I dropped my hand full of rocks and marched victoriously back to my comfortable chair on the porch. Silence. I refilled my coffee cup with fresh brew and settled down to enjoy the silence of the beautiful morning. Sitting in my silence I felt a strange sense of sadness.

My little feathered morning companion was gone. I had driven it away. But, my victory did not please me. I was sorry that I had behaved the way I did. I wanted the bird to come back. It did not. It was at that point in time that I realized an unpleasant pattern in my life, i.e. working hard to get circumstances and situations in my life the way I wanted them only to discover after the fact that I was not happy with my behavior or the outcome. It felt like the man who cliimbed the tall ladder of success only to discover that his ladder was against the wrong wall.

My eleven-year old grandson and I were playing a round of golf one summer morning. He was not having a very good time of hitting the ball straight. After one of his scuffs he turned to me and said, "I think it is a mental thing, Poppie!" I laughed. Many times I have worked vigurously to change my environment only to discover that the problem was more mental than enviro/mental. Situations and circumstances are nothing more than situations and circumstances until we label them one way or another, good or bad, aggravating or pleasing, right or wrong, sad or happy.

I can try to change those circumstances that I deem unpleasant. I can throw rocks at birds that I label "stupid". But, I must remember the words of my grandson, Parker. "It is a mental thing, Poppie!" Changing the situation does not necessarily change me or my moods and attitudes. I change when I change my thinking because "Thinking is Everything".

Managing Thoughts

"Your own mind is a sacred enclosure into which nothing harmful can enter except by your permission."

Arnold Bennett (1867-1932)

Life is thoughts. Life is over when thinking ceases. Thinking determines the kind of life one leads and the quality of life one experiences. It is biologically impossible for someone to have a thought for another person. Thinking is an individual experience, governed and controlled by an individual's brain. Brain disease and brain injury are poniant reminders of how individualized thinking really is. As much as we might like to help a friend or loved one think, it is impossible.

Managing one's thoughts is the most significant of human tasks , and one of the most overlooked or minimized. Managing one's thoughts is not optional. Thoughts are always managed in such a way as to either maximize or minimize one's life experience.

Mental health, like physical health, is crucial to optimal living, or to use Abraham Maslow's terminolgy, "self-actualization." Ignoring one's physical health or making unwise decisions regarding personal health is costly. When individuals fail to eat properly, neglect excercize and use harmful chemicals on or in their bodies they set themselves up for pain, suffering and premature death.

The same is true of one's mental life. When an individual learns how to think correctly, maximizing positive thoughts while minimizing negative, he or she reaps the benefits of pleasant emotions and productive behavior. Putting positive information into the brain while guarding the mind from intrusive malignant images is health.

Managing thoughts is the greatest of all individual tasks. Manager training is sometimes needed.